The Role Confidence Plays in Executive and Leadership Presence

“A good leader inspires people to have confidence in the leader; a great leader inspires people to have confidence in themselves.”  – Eleanor Roosevelt There is one piece leadership that is so important that without it, I believe leadership cannot exist. That piece is confidence.

Leaders can learn skills, like solving problems, strategic planning, risk analysis, how to coach, mentor and many other fundamentals of leading and managing. However, if a leader doesn’t have confidence, their leadership exists only in title. I’ve seen very technically competent leaders who lack self confidence expend a lot of energy trying to get people to follow him or her.  Only to revert to destructive, aggressive or blaming behaviors that does not inspire followership.

Research shows that confident people are not without their share of fears and insecurities. The difference is they don’t allow those fears and insecurities to control them.  They’ve learned to be proactive in changing the thoughts, behaviors, and decisions that keep them stuck in a fearful, insecure and constrained life. As Francisco Dao says, “Self-confidence is the fundamental basis from which leadership grows. Trying to teach leadership without first building confidence is like building a house on a foundation of sand. It may have a nice coat of paint, but it is ultimately shaky at best.”

Here are 7 things confident leaders do.

1. Believe in Themselves – A confident leader communicates and leads effectively because there is a belief in their own capabilities. They are lifelong learners who continually strengthen their skills, which in turn build more competence that strengthens their confidence. Confident leaders ignore critics because of their innate belief in their own effectiveness. Don’t let negative feedback destroy your confidence.

2. Value Others – A confident leader makes others around them feel important. Team members will say things like, “they make me feel like the most important person,” or “even if we disagree I always leave the discussion feeling heard.” Think about how to really listen to others and value their differences.

3. Manage Inner Dialogue – Have you ever heard people who are overly critical of themselves? They might say things like, “I’m too old,” or “I’m not smart enough,” or “I’m not creative enough.” Even if you don’t say this out loud, thinking these negative thoughts erodes confidence. It is important to remember when using any negative self-talk, to recognize what you are saying, stop and replace the negative thoughts with more positive thoughts. Confident leaders stay honest with themselves, even when the truth seems difficult. This actually builds confidence and creates trust within their team.

4. Speak Up – A confident leader has many ideas and beliefs and is comfortable expressing them. They don’t worry about saying the wrong thing, upsetting others, or looking foolish. Why? Because they communicate authentically, and value and respect others. When personal boundaries are crossed, they respectfully let the other person know how they have crossed the line. It’s okay to be passionate about yours and others beliefs, opinions and ideas. With confidence comes the ability to respond with respect, empathy, delight, etc. for those who have a different viewpoint.

 5. Learn From Mistakes – How many times have you made a mistake or failed at something? What happened to you? Did you crawl into bed, put the covers over your head and disappear? Did you blame others? Did you lose your confidence? Confident leaders understand failure is necessary for success, know that mistakes are inevitable, and are quick to own up to them. They apologize and take full responsibility for actions when appropriate. They fix the situation and then move on to the next challenge. They know failure holds many lessons to be used in the future. They are not without feelings of disappointment and like everyone they take time to heal. However, they are able to move past the mistake and try again. Failure isn’t an excuse to quit, nor do they let failure destroy them.

6. Listen to Their Intuition – Ever have that gut feeling about something? Call it what you want, “gut feeling”, “intuition”, “this doesn’t look right”, there is important information in intuition. Confident leaders value their own judgment and listen to their own intuition. They recognize they have the ability to find answers for most situations on their own. They will seek input and guidance, but are very comfortable making a final decision.

7. Remain Authentic to Who They Are – You can be extraverted or shy and still be confident. You can be Ivy school educated or a high school GED and still be confident. Confident leaders understand that self esteem comes from accepting who you are and what is achievable by being completely authentic. They don’t try to morph into someone they’re not. As Marie Curie once said: “Life is not easy for any of us. But what of that? We must have perseverance and above all confidence in ourselves. We must believe that we are gifted for something and that this thing must be attained.”

Remember self-confidence is a skill you can learn. And just like any other skill, it needs vigilance and practice. It is confidence that separates average leaders from great leaders. Do you want to be an average leader or a great leader? What do you need to continue to do to build your confidence? Let us help you to understand what may be holding you back from reaching your goals. Is it confidence? Ask us a question or join The Executive Presence Group. We are here to help.